It’s kind of become a dirty word, RESOLUTION. “New Year, New You” has become overused and trite.

Am I right?

We should want to be kinder, gentler, healthier, every day, I suppose, but it’s not even that. It’s the simple fact that there is too much pressure, too much to do, not enough time in the day.

We have to TRIAGE – prioritize without guilt.

I get weary of starting so many sentences with “after this weekend,” “when I finish this task,” and “I just need to get through this month.”

My goal has always been to build time into my schedule for:

1. Family – my husband, our kids, and my extended family
2. Faith & Service
3. Business & Work
4. Activities for Me – exercise, writing, reading, organizing our photos, time with friends

This is probably a lot like your list. But how often do you see number 3 hedging its way to the top of the list, pushing exercise, reading, even your family out of the way. If the start of a new year gives you pause and you re-evaluate and reprioritize, that’s awesome.

But, on average, New Year’s resolutions last a month or less.

So, what can we do to make the changes we want? I have some ideas.

First, surround yourself with reminders of what matters.

PICTURES, of course pictures.

I have a magnetic board beside my desk. I add current reminders in layers until the magnets won’t hold anymore. There are a couple of pictures of Chip that remain uncovered. There’s a 45 (that’s a single-song record, in case you don’t know) on which my brother wrote his name – a reminder to love the ones you love because they can be taken without warning.

But there are business recognition post cards, my daughter’s latest headshot, a photo strip from photo booth of Chip and I with the kids, a card from my grandma, a bible verse that spoke to me one day.

Every time I add to this or clean it up so that I can add more, it is a reminder to me of the priorities I need to keep.

I love displaying photos on canvas or metal prints, photo books, and other family memorabilia that says to my family, “You matter to me, and I treasure the moments we share.”

If you display only fine art or posters or nothing, you’re denying yourself an easy way to build the self-esteem of your loved ones.

Christmas 2007: I love me!

“According to psychologists, photography has a positive benefit for children’s self-esteem and helps them develop stronger confidence.

“Scientists have proven that it is valuable for children to see themselves as part of a family unit….

“Growing up in a space where [we see ourselves] in photos, surrounded by [our] loved ones, helps us….” We learn where we fit it, who we are, we “understand the story of [our] family….”

Yurchuk-Kostukovsky, inna. “Science Proves…,” 05 June 2020. Medium.com.

Seeing our photos on display teaches us that we belong, that we matter.

Second, cut yourself some slack.

You don’t need that wordle-running-bible reading-journaling streak. You need to feel satisfied by the activity you choose, and if you have a day when you nap more than productivity, okay.

I recently started working with a trainer, and she actually gave me permission to NOT workout for extended periods daily. Add a few minutes here and there in the day.

• Bestie calls – take a walk while chatting.
• Laundry needs to be taken downstairs – make multiple trips, turning it into a 10-minute mini-cardio.
• Writer’s block – mull it over while stretching or doing planks.
• Add longer workouts when you can, but JUST KEEP MOVING.

The same is true with gathering your family story.

I have been working on our #DigitalEstate since 2015. In that time, I have sometimes worked on curating for 15-30 minutes a day a few days a week. Other times, I’ve taken a whole day and binge-worked. (Binge-working is more my style, honestly.) Sometimes, I don’t do anything beyond uploading current pix from my phone and camera card.

So my #FOREVERStorage is not in perfect condition.But what I have done is a pretty cool list. Check it out:

1. Any photos that were ONLY stored elsewhere, like Shutterfly, Snapfish, Facebook, Amazon, iCloud, etc. have been retrieved and uploaded to my FOREVER Account.
2. My husband and each of my kids have their own accounts where they upload photos and share them with me.
3. I have digitized outdated media and preserved it in our account.
4. I have shared things I’ve digitized with secure share links so other family members can enjoy them.
5. I have fully curated family photos from 2003 through 2008, selecting and uploading them to our FOREVER account.
6. Most of our pix from 2015 through YESTERDAY are uploaded and organized into albums. Some even have tagging and descriptions completed.

So, I could focus on the fact that I have much NOT done.

Instead, I need to give myself credit for what IS done.

I can pretty easily find the photo, video, or document I want out of MANY thousands I have uploaded and preserved. THAT, my friends, is an accomplishment that has happened without sacrificing family time, faith, friends. Maybe I did it instead of reading or writing or cleaning, but it’s a permanent, lasting gift to my family to have our story documented to the degree that it is, so I’m okay with that.

And, isn’t it that way with much of life? We fall into the trap of seeing great things others have done (often

posted on social media and so maybe not 100% what it seems to be). We compare ourselves to the person who got their PhD at 25 when we should be super proud of ourselves for finishing that BA at 50. We look at a formidable to-do list instead of applauding the all-done list. We overwhelm ourselves by studying and elevating our imperfections.

If we give ourselves space to breathe, if we tally our strengths and proclaim our talents, we will more than likely become more productive – less like hamsters on the wheels and more like a human beings honoring themselves by realistically managing their priorities.